Updated: Nov 19, 2020
I've been reflecting a lot this week about the journey that is life. It's never a straight line. It's hard, then it's a little easier. It's unpredictable at times. It tests us, it blesses us. It's a constant roller coaster of up-down, up-down.
Forward is forward though, and all progress is a blessing. But sometimes when the progress has been slow and steady, it's so easy to become complacent when remembering to acknowledge just how far we have come and what we have achieved.
They say 'never look back', but looking back to remind you of just how far you are from where you used to be is humbling and often times surprising. It's easy to have a selective memory when it comes to the past. Sometimes if we go through a hard time, we can try our best to bury it deep in the past where it can't come back to haunt or trigger us. When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and hold a mirror up to the past, it can be bittersweet, but sweet nonetheless.
This past week I really let the feeling of deflation creep in, the self sabotaging thoughts started to fill my mind (read my blog post about how to stop self sabotage here) and I felt anxious without a real rhyme or reason. Then I thought to myself, let me look at the bigger picture. Where was I a year ago...two years ago? I had to smile. In that moment I became overwhelmed with the growth that has taken place within me and in my life during that time, and I felt a sense of relief.
More than anything though, I felt grateful for all the tests, the pain, the struggle and the time spent working hard and praying that got me to where I am today. I'm grateful for all of it.
If you're reading this and you too have been feeling like you're not enough, you're not doing enough, you're not where you want to be yet or engaging in negative self-talk - remember that time when you didn't think you'd be able to carry on. Remember that time where you felt like this but 10x worse. Remember that time you didn't know what your next step would be. You made it through it all.
You may not be where you want to be just yet, trust me you are on your way.
Love and light,